The author reflects on their love-hate relationship with the Haredi world, expressing admiration for its simplicity and unity while also feeling relief for choosing a different path. They discuss the comfort of having a rabbi to turn to for guidance but also the frustration of not being able to think for oneself. The author grapples with the issue of their son serving in the IDF while Haredi boys his age focus on Torah study. They describe the Haredi world as a gated community within Judaism, offering safety and structure but also insularity. Ultimately, the author embraces the messy and complicated space between the Haredi world and the modern world, finding their own way to serve Hashem and raise their children.